So you wanna un-hex those dice do ya?
Well not so fast. It ain't easy wiping off that dirty hex. It was put on them dice real good, see? It's going to take several specific steps in order to get those bones clean, and misery off your back...
1.
Snag a Lucky Rabbit's Foot:
Get yourself a lucky rabbit's foot, a fake one you animal! Don't be a dunce, we ain't about hurting no bunnies.
2.
Moonlight Cleansing:
Take those dice out under a full moon and let that lunar light wash away all the bad vibes.
3.
Salt and Incense:
Mix up some salt and incense and give those dice a good smokin'. It's like a spa day for 'em, see?
4.
Whiskey Baptism:
Pour a little fine whiskey over those bones, baptize 'em right. Makes 'em feel special, ya know?
5.
Load Up on Lucky Charms:
Surround those dice with lucky charms and trinkets, like four-leaf clovers or horseshoes. It's like an insurance policy.
6.
Whisper the Incantation:
Mumble the secret incantation over your dice, callin' on the spirits to give it a break for once.
"Oh, Lady Luck, you sly old fox, These dice of mine need a paradox. From loaded tricks, set 'em straight, Let's roll the dice, change their fate. In the moonlight's glow, and whiskey's embrace, Cleanse these bones in a secret place. With a rabbit's foot, and charms so fine, Bless these dice, make 'em shine. By starry skies and luck's delights, Hex be gone on this silent night. Roll 'em good, don't make me frown, Bring some luck when I'm paintin' the town!"
7.
Roll for Redemption:
Give 'em three rolls, apologize for any past wrongs or shady business with 'em.
8.
Hide 'Em Good:
Wrap 'em up tight in a clean, white cloth, stash 'em somewhere safe and secret. Protect 'em from any bad juju.
9.
Trust in Fate:
Last but not least, remember, it ain't all about tricks and hocus-pocus. Sometimes, you gotta trust in the twist of fate. Lady Luck's got her own plan.
FAQs
Are these hexxed dice endorsed by any ancient, soul-sucking entities?
We can't confirm or deny any endorsements from the underworld, but our hexxed dice have been known to turn a few heads (360 degrees).
What's the warranty on these hexxed dice? Can I get a refund if my soul goes missing?
Ah, the ol' soul-refund policy! Sadly, once your soul is on the line, it's a no-return deal. But hey, you might actually enjoy being a hollow husk of a person.
Do these dice come with an exorcist's guide, just in case?
We thought you'd never ask! Here is a link to a guide on exorcising hexxed dice.
Warning: Results may vary.
Can I use these dice for non-soul-related activities, like Monopoly?
Sure, you can use them for Monopoly, but be prepared for some sinister property deals.
How do I clean my hexxed dice?
We recommend a mixture of holy water, garlic, and a pinch of hope. If that doesn't work, consider giving them a vacation in a haunted castle for a few nights.
